Monday, January 4, 2010

Journeys and Destinations (Part 1)

The destination is what gives a journey its meaning. As someone who has made the trip between Georgia and New Jersey countless times, I think I can say that with confidence. Sure sometimes the trip is fun, but let's be honest - we wouldn't be in the car in the first place if it weren't for the destination. And when the trip is not fun (think 4 hours on I-95 south of DC going 15 miles an hour), it's the destination that makes it worth continuing.

If you don't know where you're going, you can't plan the trip. You need to know where you're going to know how long it's going to take, what you should pack, if you need to book a hotel room. And plane tickets would be really hard to buy if you didn't know where you were headed. Just try searching Expedia for flights from your local airport to nowhere in particular. You won't get any results.

The destination changes everything. The destination, really, defines the trip.

I've been thinking about this a lot lately. It's changed how I went about making New Year's resolutions this year. I love New Year's resolutions. I love to think that on December 31st at midnight my whole life becomes a blank slate again. Even though it doesn't. Even though I'm still the same person with all the same strengths and faults on January 1st as I was 24 hours earlier. There's just something promising about a brand new untarnished year. And so I usually make a resolution or two. Or ten. Thinking that I'm really going to change everything in the upcoming year and finally be who I want to be. It doesn't really happen. Yesterday I found my resolution list for 2009. I'd kept exactly 0 of them.

So this year, I decided to look at it a little differently. This year, I'm taking a trip. And so instead of just trying to say what I'll DO in 2010, I've really thought about who I want to BE by the end of the year. And I came up with three broad goals:
1. To get healthy (isn't that on everyone's resolution list?)
2. To get organized
3. To get connected

Now that I have these broad goals to know where I want to be, I can start planning the trip. With three broad goals in place, I started marking the stops along the journey with tasks for each month. For example - under my goal to get healthy - in January, I will walk 1 mile 5 times a week with Kona, cut out soda from my diet and start taking my vitamins every day. Very doable, right? My organizational goal for January - to create and start following a cleaning schedule and cut out daytime TV. Not too tough. And for getting connected? Make a list of family and friend birthdays and buy cards; and join a church small group (cheater alert - I already had that lined up before January 1st; it was a gimme).

Each month of my year has a different task within my 3 big goals. I'm gradually upping my workouts, adjusting my diet, organizing my home and schedule, and becoming more intentional in my relationships. I'm giving myself time to travel. I'm focusing on where I want to be instead of just what I want to do. And as Bob says, "I'm baby steppin! I'm doing the work!" I'll keep you updated at the end of each month to let you know how I'm doing.

Stay tuned for Part 2 :)

Saturday, November 14, 2009

Quarantined

I'd like to apologize in advance to anyone who reads this.

If you read Shannon's blog, you may have seen my comment about the wonderful morning I had on Wednesday. If you don't read Shannon's blog, here's a recap:

I woke up and looked out the kitchen windows into my neighbor's backyard. This was a problem, because there should've been a fence between our windows and the neighbor's backyard. Apparently two very rainy days followed by a super windy night had done some damage to our already tattered fence. Four entire sections had fallen into the neighbor's yard and a couple of the post were not exactly vertical. As I picked up my phone to call Jamie and tell him about this unfortunate development, I glanced over at Kona still in his crate. He'd had a bit of a stomach thing going on and had thrown up Monday evening and again overnight in his crate. So when I saw something on his pillow I assumed he had tossed his cookies again. Oh if only he had just tossed his cookies...

When I opened the crate, he came running out rather frantically and I realized the something on his pillow was ALL OVER - he was covered in it, the crate was covered in it...the floor around the crate and the wall behind the crate...it was horrendous. And it. Smelled. Horrible.

Here is where I make mistake number one, both chronologically and in severity of the error - I ignored the fact that he was standing right near the back door, and chased him into the bathroom. The problem with this approach was that el poocho was leaving a wake of diarrhea every where he went - walls, floors, furniture...nothing was safe. In retrospect, I should have put him out back and hosed him down, but it was cold out and there was the fallen fence to consider. Here's a riddle: what's worse than waking up to find your neighbor's dog on your back patio? Finding your neighbor's DIARRHEA COVERED dog on your back patio. We're not super close with our neighbors. I don't think that would've strengthened the relationship.

Anyway...into the bathroom we went and Kona got the most thorough bath he'd ever gotten. And I gagged approximately 723,295,774 times. Do yourself a favor and try not to imagine the state of my clothing following this bath. It wasn't pretty.

After changing into something slightly less poo-covered, I dragged Kona's crate, pillow and blanket outside to hose down. This actually would've been the easiest part of the clean-up if it were't for the run-in my ankle had with the concrete on our patio. It's a nice sized cut, and it still hurts. Meanwhile, Kona is locked in the bathroom drying off and blessing the floor with fresh gifts from his lower intestine.

Thankfully at that point I had an epiphany - the tie-out! We'd bought it and never used it. I don't even remember why. So Kona went outside, tied to one of the fence posts that was still standing while I scrubbed the floors, walls and furniture in my entire house. The places I found diarrhea....this is the stuff nightmares are made of.

At that point, Kona was shaking violently outside because it was rather chilly and he was rather wet, so I threw his now-hosed off bed things in the washer (cycles: rinse, wash, rinse, wash, rinse...just trying to balance out all those who conserve water) and brought him inside, still on the tie-out, tethered to the back door. He may come in, but he may not come near me or my carpet until he recovers.

And that leads us to the quarantine. For the past few days, this has been the pathetic outcast pooch in my sunroom:




Sad, no? But it took 24 hours with no food and 48 eating nothing but white rice before the stomach bug started to show signs of leaving. He's still on a bland diet and still tethered to my back door, but hopefully tomorrow he'll get a good bath and be loosed, free to roam the house at his leisure once more.

But not the backyard, because the fence still has a ways to go before it's pronounced healed.

Wednesday, November 11, 2009

The Pantry

I’m in an interesting season of my life right now; one that I never imagined myself in. I always thought I’d be a stay-at-home mom if at all possible, so I didn’t foresee myself being a career woman. But I’d always assumed I’d work until I entered mommyhood. Being a full-time housewife without kids at home isn’t something I expected. I try to be very careful not to complain too much because I know how good I have it – most of my friends work and would give anything for a day just to sleep in and watch Gilmore Girls. And so many families do not have the option of being a one-income household. Especially a one-income household that lives in a great house and can still afford to do things like travel and go out with friends. So I’m well aware of how blessed I am.

But blessed is not the same as fulfilled. And while I’m grateful, a sense of fulfillment has been hard for me to find.

It’s not that I don’t have things to give my time and attention to. I’m a wife, a homeowner, a middle school volunteer at church, a friend, daughter, sister…all things that I can give my time and attention to. And there are a lot of opportunities that I now have the time to pursue: going back to school, becoming a CASA, volunteering, scrapbooking, home improvement projects, getting in better shape, etc., etc. It’s just that I’m having a hard time not being where I thought I’d be and embracing all these opportunities. I tend to spend more time wishing things were different.

I gave this analogy to Jamie the other day: you know when you’re hungry and you have something very specific in mind that you want to eat? Like maybe chocolate. If you go into the kitchen and all the chocolate is gone you feel like there’s nothing to eat, even though your fridge might be full of delicious, nutritional things. And you might eat something just because it’s there but it doesn’t satisfy. It’s not what your tummy is really wanting. And, if you’re like me you start whining that there’s nothing to eat despite that fact that actually there are a lot of options.

My hypothetical pantry is very full right now. But I still find myself whining that there’s nothing to eat. I want some chocolate and everything looks like celery to me. And I’m sure my attitude is as obnoxious to God as it was to my mom when I was living at home.

I’m trying. Really I am. Jamie – who gets to hear all my whining - might disagree. There will come a time in the future where I will look back longingly at this time in my life. I know there will. I need to figure out how to appreciate this season and embrace its blessings before it ends. And I have bigger things to schedule my day around than my regular 11:00 date with Lorelai and Rory Gilmore.

Tuesday, September 22, 2009

Hilarity

I know, I know, I haven't written a real post in forever. It's just because nothing is happening. I'm not working, I stay home with Kona all day and it's less than thrilling. Biggest recent happening - I went to lock-in for the middle school girls at our church. We were expecting 60 or so girls and wound up with 140. There were 5 adults who stayed over night. That's a crazy ratio. But I loved it! I hope the girls had as much fun as I did!!

Anyway, my apologies for not writing anything of note, but I just had to share this because it's too funny. Enjoy!! (P.S. Do yourself a favor and hit pause at the end of the video or you'll have to endure a commercial).

Thursday, July 30, 2009

Good, Better, Best!

GOOD...

This past week since my last update has had its highs and lows. I had gotten down to 142, but seemed kinda stuck there. Three more pounds and I could be in the 30's. Three more pounds!! So I thought I'd crack down this week. Phase 2 of the 3-part workout started Tuesday so I figured I would make sure to really eat healthily and knock out those three pounds. Unfortunately, it became hormonally necessary for me to consume copious amounts of chocolate. The routine for the last few days has been, wake up, eat a healthy breakfast, eat a healthy lunch, steal a chocolate from Jamie's birthday stash, eat a healthy snack, eat a healthy dinner....and then fall apart completely and eat whatever sweets I can access. I am a weak, weak woman. I also skipped my morning workout for the first time on Tuesday. But it worked out ok. I usually plan to take a 30 minute nap right after work to give me some energy for the evening (ah the bliss of being young and childless). Tuesday I slept 30 minutes later and worked out when I got home. So I got more sleep in the morning and worked out after work instead of my usual schedule. It's all good.

I skipped again today, completely accidentally. I woke up to an alarm that didn't quite sound like mine and realized it was Jamie's. I'd completely forgotten to set mine and overslept. It was kind of blissful. And I hit it hard yesterday - ate healthy, worked out in the morning, power walked after work - so I wasn't too concerned about a morning off. Plus, phase 2 is HARD! Anyway, when I did drag myself out of bed and over to the bathroom scale, I found...wait for it...I'm officially in the 130's!! Woot woot!! If my scale had decimals (which it doesn't because it's one of those crappy ones with the wheel thing instead of a digital read-out), it would probably say 139.7, but I was definitely below the 140 line. Woo hoo!!

BETTER...

A couple months ago I bought a pair of pants at Banana Republic that were a little bit too tight. They were on clearance, I loved them and they didn't have the next size up. And I wanted to lose weight anyway (I know, you shouldn't buy clothes that don't fit because you plan on fitting into them soon and all but I liked them). I'm wearing them today. And they fit beautifully! Mazel tov!!

BEST...

MOMREKA!! (that's "mom found it" for those of you who don't speak, um, whatever that is). In December, while at my parents' house for Christmas, I did a load of laundry and stupidly left my wedding rings in the pocket of a sweatshirt I washed. When the load was done, the wedding band was there, but the engagement ring was no where to be found. My whole family searched high and low. We checked the washing machine trap, we searched through the laundry, we tore my room apart, we checked the trap again, we looked in the trash cans and in all the nooks and crannies of the house, we checked the trap a third time...no where. It was gone. In January, my dad once again checked the trap. Still not there. I was sure it had been washed out to sea and I shed many tears for it.

But, lo and behold, my mom randomly checked the trap again yesterday and THERE IT WAS!! In all its sparkly cleaness! Perhaps a bit misshapen (though I haven't seen it yet, so that might just be from my finger), but shiny and waiting to be reunited with its partner on my left hand again. I could not have gotten any better news! I can't wait to have it back on my finger and look married again!

Wednesday, July 22, 2009

Challenge, Extended...

Well, Shannon's and my post on our less-than-perfect silhouettes has led my mom to extend a family challenge: $10 a person to enter and whoever has lost the most weight by our trip to Wisconsin gets the pot.


Challenge, accepted...

Me and Shannon jumped on board and all three of us ladies brought our husbands into it, too, though I don't know if George and Dad are truly enthusiastic about this competition or if, like Jamie, they don't even know their wife has committed them to it (hey if I win there's an extra $10 in the pot for me!).

Here's where I stand right now (though I loathe to publish this on the internet): I weigh 147 pounds - or did when I started - and hate the way I look in a bathing suit. I am 25, I've had no babies, I have no excuse. Never mind, hold on, I work at a desk job. 8 hours a day of sitting. All. Day. Long. It makes my hips wider just thinking about it. Secretary spread much? Yes, I think so. So there's my excuse. I feel justified.

Here's my goals: Ideally, I would like to get under 135 pounds. That's a 13 pound weight loss. If I can get under 140, I'll be happy. Under 135, totally content. And anywhere in the 132 and under range would have me purely ecstatic. More importantly, Jamie and I are hoping to spend Labor Day weekend in Hilton Head. I do not plan on leaving the beach while the sun's up. Just me, a good book, and the sand and waves from sunup to sundown. And I want to go on that beach vacation with any bathing suit I choose and feel good about. Not look like I'm ready to walk the Victoria's Secret runway (though I'll take that!!), just be secure and confident with how I look.

And most importantly, I want to be healthy and strong so that Jamie and I can start planning a family, and I can feel confident going in that I've done everything in my power to prepare my body for a healthy pregnancy - for both me and (hopefully) the future little one.

The Plan: I've bought a book and a DVD to help me eat healthier and work out consistently. I've started a calorie tracking notebook to make sure I consume the right amount of the right kinds of food. Every morning I get up and do my dvd workout and in the evenings, I just make sure to do something active, even if it's a leisurely walk with Jamie. The tendency for us is to get home at 5:30 and veg out until bed. I also keep track of how much water I drink and try to get to bed on time, two small things that are supposed to make me feel better and lose weight. And lastly, I've cut caffeine out completely. Oh how I miss it...

The hardest part so far has been the meals. I actually like them. But I LOVE carbs. I want bread with every meal and pasta at least once a week and a bowl of cereal once or twice a day - usually big ones. I miss these things, but I'm enjoying the fish, chicken and eggs that have mostly made up my meals so far. The workout's not so bad but I do find my muscles are sore and/or weak the rest of the day, which stinks. Just me getting stronger!! Or something like that.

So far, so good because I'm down 3 pounds and it's only day 5. I've consistently kept my calories within the recommended limit and I've consumed a full lake's worth of water! I do miss my morning caffeine, but I think I'm sleeping better without consuming any.

Can I make it 25 more days and reach my goals? I don't know, but I'm feeling good so far. Weak and sore, but good. And it's always good to have a little healthy competition to inspire me! So Mom, Shannon - BRING IT ON!!

Wednesday, July 15, 2009

Flabby Fat and Lazy!!

Ok so I'm going to piggyback off of my sister's post here and say it's officially time for the Hotalens to start getting back in shape. Question: What happens when you take two college soccer players, throw 'em off the field, get 'em hitched, and plop them into desk jobs? Answer: they gain 20 pounds and painfully pasty skin. So that's where we are - two former athletes who still want to eat like we're running 4 miles a day or so and are suffering the consequences.

We're not so thrilled with our less-than-toned selves (and I have no pregnancies to blame it on, unlike my sister) so it's time to do something about it. Jamie and I started a Biggest Loser challenge a month or so ago thinking we could both lose 15-20 pounds by eating healthier and adding some exercise into our routines. Unfortunately, taking a short jog in the morning and walking each evening and counting calories has resulted in both of us losing about 2 pounds in the past 4 or 5 weeks. Not exactly what we were hoping for. So it's time to kick it into high gear! Tonight I'm hitting Wal-Mart and finding me some books/dvds to make the next 30 days get skinny days! I'll let you know what I find and, 30 days from now, how it worked for us.

Family, when you see Jamie and I in Wisconsin in August, hopefully there will be a lot less of us to see!!

My goal is to get to a weight BEFORE we have kids that I'll want to get back to AFTER we have kids!! I don't want to start working out after my first baby is born saying, "Well if I could just lose the baby weight PLUS that 15 pounds I never lost before getting pregnant, I'll be happy!"

In the coming weeks, look for a thrilling post called, "Body Image: Why are we NEVER Satisfied?" HAHA



Hello Skinny Hotalens. You are greatly missed. Please come back.